I feel like I’m channeling my inner Carrie Bradshaw as I write about this (so Sex And The City.)

I’ve noticed this little issue with several girls I know. They fall for a guy, the relationship is fun… and then things turn south, leaving the girl with a heartbreak. He’s mean to her, he ignores her, and she just doesn’t understand why. So, here you are (being the great BFF that you are), being her shoulder to cry on for weeks, when all of a sudden that douchebag sends her a text, wanting to talk. And thus begins the ugly, ugly cycle. We’ve all had that friend (or for some of you, this may hit close to home.) Why would she go back to him after he hurt her?

For most of us in our twenties, one of our ultimate life quests is to find love. Most college boys are not ready for relationships, and when we find one that is, we find ourselves falling for them quicker than ever. And when they break our hearts… it really, really hurts.

But if these boys continually hurt us, why do we go back to them? Is it the familiarity? Is it because we’re lonely? Is it that we think we can’t find anyone better than them? The truth of the matter is that we are beautiful, intelligent women that deserve everything in a relationship and more. Sometimes, you just have to accept the fact that a relationship isn’t meant to be. Point blank. What’s for you won’t pass you by, and if this boy breaks your heart, let him go. Perhaps what you’re holding on to doesn’t exist anymore. It’s hard not to hold onto precious memories, but you have to remember that loneliness should never drive you back into the arms of someone you know you don’t belong with.

So, if this boy doesn’t put forth a solid effort to fix the damage done in the past, let him go. If someone wants to be a part of your life, they’ll make strong effort to be in it. Don’t bother reserving a space in your heart for someone who doesn’t make an effort to stay. Just remember that you can’t start the next chapter in your life if you’re still re-reading the last one. Also remember that a man should never define your happiness. You don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy.

You are a strong confident woman that has a lot to offer to any man. Don’t forget that.

Does this sound all too familiar? Let’s chat in the comments below!